Monthly Archives: October 2007

Moving to Chicago

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So I’m moving to Chicago soon, to be a little fish in a big pond.  That’s quite all right — I’m sick of Grand Rapids, sick of prowling around the same four neighborhoods, sick of hanging around shopping malls just to get the feeling of being in a large crowd, sick of forgiving everyone and everything around me for being second rate just because it’s only Grand Rapids . . . so I’ll finally be where cool things are actually cool and I’ll have to compete with people who actually are at the top of their field, which is good for me.

 I’ll also have to clean up my act on the web; about ten times as many people will read my writing, and about one tenth as many will care what it says.  I have an opportunity to “remake” myself in a way — I’m not denying who I was but I get to choose who I want to be in this new setting.  I’m arguing with spirits about that these last couple of days . . . I guess I’m a writer.  Really I’m an intuitive, and I hope to pick up some extra cash doing readings for people, but as an intuitive I have to express myself artistically for some reason . . .

International Fucking

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I’m working on astral projection in earnest now.  My main focus is projecting to my soul mate, [name removed because she turned out to be a scummy whore], who lives in Toronto 360 miles away.  Yesterday I projected to her and was reliving the feelings (because the astral plane is composed of feelings) of what sex was like when I first met her — except even better because there weren’t any annoying intrusions of materiality, like having to go to the bathroom or anything.

So when I talked to her on the phone last night it turned out that she did feel me and she did start feeling sexy, noticeably in a way she hadn’t felt in years.  So it WORKS!  You see we already share each others’ dreams and experience telepathy, so this is just a step toward a conscious kind of voyage outside this plane.

For instance our guiding spirit [name removed because this was an actor she was actually stalking] was telling [this ridiculous whore] through me that the difference between astral existence and existence in the world is like the difference between fluid dynamics and linear dynamics.  Honestly I didn’t even know linear dynamics was a real thing but it turns out that [this sordid little cow], who is a physicist [not true], is working on exactly that right now.  So [that astral voice] has been watching over us the whole time.  This is awesome.

April 17, 2020 – this woman was actually stalking me, and I did have a lot of crazy experiences around her I thought were psychic, but some of that was because she was evil and “gaslighting” me.  Over the years I’ve worked to sort out fantasy versus reality in the strange, distorted, dreamlike experiences I’ve had with her.

Brett Easton Ellis

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I’m reading Brett Easton Ellis now, “Rules of Attraction” a blast from my past (language is destructive) . . . in fact so much a blast from my past that last Saturday I got raving drunk and actually groped this girl I know.  I was reliving college, being a teenager in the late 80s when the reality was being sucked out of popular culture.  someday perhaps I will be able to express the nature of this time warp.  The late 80s was a very astral decade, what with MTV and all . . . everyone realizing that society was based more on visual impressions than any kind of logic or morality.

Listening to “Team Sleep”, awesome record.  Also picked up one by Popol Vuh down at Vertigo.  “Rules of Attraction” mentions The Thomposon Twins several times . . . interesting to know that this millionaire author was hearing the same music I was back then. 

 there’s no point to this post except a snapshot of my life and an exploration of the concept of “work”.  life is a lot of (sometimes apparently meaningless) steps that eventually lead somewhere . . . I have this fucking blog i should do something useful with it.  my next post will be useful.