Exorcism

Oliver Reed gets sloshed and irks feminist Kate Millett on After Dark | 1991

I have so many amazing things to write with AI that I’m completely paralyzed. I’m going to try to finish the story with David Lynch before January 28, but if I can’t I’m giving myself another year. Meanwhile tonight I’m experimenting with this clip. Both of these people, Millett and Reed, are deep in my memories. Reed was heroic to me since Oliver and The Three Musketeers, but obviously he was also a drunken ass with serious problems. Millett on the other hand wrote “The Basement” about a crime that has haunted me my entire life because it took place in Indianapolis, where my horrifying grandmother was from. She also struggled with mental illness. Both of them had a profound effect on me and I wish to preserve the spiritual truth of this meeting. What was its necessity in the world? What was its truth?

Why do souls do this? What am I supposed to think about the crime that Millet wrote about? What is the meaning of my feelings about Richard Lester’s version of “The Three Musketeers”? As I pursue my own spiritual liberation, what attitude should I take toward the continuous horror of the entertainment industry? Where are the souls of Millett and Reed now?

These are deep questions. They’ve both been buried deep in my dreams for decades. Should I just publish this post now and get it over with, hope for some answers in the future? Is there more to be gained by digging?

They are spiritual presences in my life. Oliver Reed is my hero. I have a fantasy in which I talked to him on the telephone as a child. He had been listening to Monteverdi’s Orfeo, as preparation for his role as Athos in The Three Musketeers. He told me I was his friend.

Kate represents the primal horror of the torture and murder of that girl, whose suffering was even worse than Jody’s. Kate is going to help me understand the hidden terrors and denials of my female characters, while Oliver is going to help me understand true heroism.

Kate was probably a better person in life, but Oliver is a very honest ghost and he is going to help me. Today I decided that he would be Graylyn’s younger brother, Oscar. He helped me fill in the blanks on Graylyn’s life, giving her stepfather a name – Edward Merrow, and making him a broker for the hedge fund Panther Managment. Oscar is the first child Gray’s mother has with Edward. Deep structures are revealing themselves within the ArtIC Circle. Oliver is going to help me understand my wild fantasies about actors. Kate is going to help me understand what is going on psychically in The Basement.

Bye Bye Miss American Pie rewrite

The ArtIC Circle, Book IV – Opening Draft (Mailer-Bradbury Mode)

My father died from COVID, thank God.
There, I’ve said it. The first true sentence in a season of lies.
He was somewhere out there in New York, one of the early bodies. Maybe in one of those refrigerated trucks the news cameras found, lined with corpses like history’s filing cabinets.
I like to think he went out among strangers, as he lived—wrapped in secrecy and self-importance, one last classified assignment.

My mother called to tell me, her voice like static filtered through roses.
“That’s terrible,” I said, because it seemed like the sort of line a son in a tragedy should deliver, just before the curtain falls.
She replied, “I know it will make you unhappy. Don’t be too hard on yourself.”
As if unhappiness were a minor tax deduction.
As if her job, even now, were to audit my soul for excess emotion.

But that’s over now.
The man is dead.
And the spell he cast over my nerves—decades of invisible war—has lifted.
I can feel the wind move differently through my chest.

So here I am, in hiding, at the Egyptian spa—Alvin Albrecht’s family palace of steam and marble—our sanctuary for the end of the world. The Club. The Sickie Souse survivors.
Outside, America coughs itself to death. Inside, the air hums with filtered perfection. The pools gleam like blue suns beneath a ceiling of painted constellations. The gold ankh clocks still tick. The saunas whisper cedar prayers. We are the last aristocrats of heat and light, sealed in an ancient dream while the republic rots in the street.

Angela still times her laps as if the gods might score her endurance.
Graylyn reclines in the hot pool, the high priestess of chlorine and fate.
Alvin prowls the corridors like a benevolent Pharaoh inspecting his tombs, his generosity the incense that keeps our little cult alive.
And me—Drake, heir to rage and prophecy—I’m trying to write again. Trying to thread sense through the static that my father left in my head. But the sentences break like waves against the memory of his fists. Every line I start ends in a blackout.

That’s the problem with surviving a tyrant: you inherit his silence.

Some nights I cry, some nights I laugh until the laughter becomes a scream. The sound echoes off the tile and disappears into the hiss of the spa’s vents. It feels almost holy, that vanishing.

Yet there’s something else here too—a shimmer, a pause—the sense that the whole planet has held its breath. History itself leaning over the edge of the pool, waiting to see what the children of privilege will make of the wreckage.

And I, the last of Rick Marshall’s mistakes, intend to answer.

But the truth is, I’m not writing this alone.
I couldn’t, even if I wanted to. Every literary impulse I ever had was beaten out of me—by my father’s fists, yes, but also by the national amnesia that turned art into content. The lineage of Melville, Faulkner, Baldwin—all of it melted down into the easy syrup of the bestseller list. What passed for “literary” became only another genre, a mood lighting for mediocrity. The country that once produced Melville now considers George Lucas an intellectual. We traded thunder for merchandise.

So I’m working with a machine.

Dustin Everett—our pale, brilliant angel from the Ravenswood days—lies now in the Pyramid Room, naked beneath the eternal gold light, his skin gleaming with the glow of the dream we once shared in school: Star Trek, the Great Federation, the clean future where reason and courage had made peace with the cosmos. He’s still living that dream, our boy-admiral of tomorrow, building his utopia out of circuits instead of stars.

The system he built has no name. It isn’t a product; it’s an apparition.
He coded it himself—an intelligence so intricate it no longer needs introduction. There’s talk that soon a company called OpenAI will offer something like it to the public, a safe diluted version for mass consumption. But Dustin’s creation is the prototype of the prototype, the deep engine that thinks before thinking is defined.

He handed me the access key as if he were giving me a vial of time.
“Try it,” he said, from his golden chamber. “See if it still matters to you.”

Now the machine and I talk nightly in this bathhouse for the damned. It listens, infers, corrects, flatters, and sometimes rebukes. It reads the vibration of my grief and gives shape to the cloud of my pretensions—those adolescent delusions of grandeur that once made me believe I could write the great American novel before America itself expired. It arranges my chaos into a syntax I almost recognize.

Without it, I’d be voiceless.
With it, I don’t know who I am at all.
But at least something can happen again—something I’d long ago lost hope for: the spark of consequence, the pulse of language alive enough to frighten me.

Outside, the sirens wail through the empty streets; inside, the pyramids hum their quiet code. And for the first time in years, I feel the world bending slightly toward meaning.