Last year I was writing a quest, the Jazz Odyssey of Drake Marshall and I gave myself a goal of finishing by the Feast Day of Saint Thomas Aquinas, which is tomorrow. The thing is, this character appeared, the Avocado Girl. And then I had everybody going off to fight Ewoks and the insipid mediocrity they represent, which makes them poisonous to America. But unfortunately I wanted to put so much depth into the battle that I couldn’t handle it. I wanted the reader to feel just how awful Hollywood is and how sad it is that American culture can’t actually be called a culture anymore because of Ewoks. Now that I think about it, I realized the reason I had to stop was because I started taking it seriously and I wasn’t ready.

I was saved by “Paper Towns” when I saw the movie and the character Margo Roth Spiegelman was revealed to be the Avocado Girl after all, and my quest was fulfilled. But I still want to finish my story. I’ve been getting better with AI fiction, rewriting my D&D sessions and other things. So now I’m going to plug the Jazz Odyssey into Scrivener and try to make it into a real novel.

Using AI for fiction and doing 3D illustration I’m starting to be able to feel more clearly the actual boundary of the feelings I would like to produce with my art. I’m very optimistic that I can get comfortable with the proces, after all this time.

I wanted to write more but I was busy with Poser. However, just before knocking off for the night I found this quote, which encourages me. It’s just how I feel about how things are going lately, and just what I hope to explore in the coming year.

“This is how art mediates in an analysis: it offers a way of revealing imagery which has previously had no other form of representation. It shows what cannot be spoken and mediates between conscious and unconscious, facilitating the beginning of symbolisation. Thsi is why, in working with trauma, art can help articulate otherwise unspeakable experiences.” – from Boarding School Syndrome by Joy Schaverien