10:11 PM 9/14/2017  I’m keeping up with my narrative, even though it’s difficult.  Last night I just went ahead and worked on Poser instead.  I did get my first “real” render done, in the sense that I was willing to show it to others. I ran a high-quality process while I slept only to realize this morning that there was a mistake in one of the poses, so tonight I worked on it again and it’s a hundred times better.  I’ve uploaded it to Renderosity.  Now it’s official!  I’ve been sitting around thinking about how good it is. 

Tonight I could detect a couple of Buffynicities, things I’d been thinking about briefly that showed up in the episode, but I’ve already forgotten them.  However there was a major one from Tuesday that I forgot as well, which I have now remembered –

Buffynicty #1  While looking for items of magic to put in my renders, I came across this item

https://www.renderosity.com/mod/bcs/the-real-deal/97259/

A briefcase full of money I was planning to get as a magical symbol.  I almost bought it that day.  Then in the episode that night …

Judy:  “I’m pretty sure he works for my former employers, the City Trust Bank of Salina, Kansas.  I was a teller there. (She goes over to the bed and pulls out a satchel from under it)  I think maybe they want this back.”
She opens it and Angel takes a look inside.  It’s full of rolled bank notes, 1000 marked on each of the wrappers we can see.

Coming on top of the Hotely synchronicity itself, right after I’d posted about the black girl who died in the hotel (gosh, I just realized as I write this that this episode is about race –

Judy:  “Because I’m not what I say I am.  I’ve been passing since I was 15 years old.”
Angel:  “Passing?”
Judy nods:  “For white.  My mother was colored, my father – I didn’t even know him! My blood isn’t pure. – It’s tainted.”

And I would not have realized that if I hadn’t “Flashed Back” again. 

So the case with the bills in it was one of the more spectacular synchronicites I’ve had.  It was odd that I forgot about it when I got home.  I really have been coveting that 3D model for days and had gone so far as to put it in my cart on the Renderosity website, but then I wound up getting something even better instead.

Buffynicity #2:  Yesterday and today I was rendering pictures of one of my guardian angels, and in the show Darla has been appearing in Angel’s dreams.  It seems to resonate.

So a lot of the Buffynicities are blending now, the references to demons and fantasies are so thick and so totallyl related to my new hobby of 3D rendering that there’s just no point in remembering them all.  However the few that stand out, like this hotel/money one, are really spectacular and consistent enough to keep the whole thing going.

As for transits:

On Wednesday the Moon trining Jupiter and squaring Chiron had me feeling pretty good about my job, but the main thing was Renderosity and Daz3D – I was finding a lot of spectaularly good deals and really feeling the magic of 3D illustration, really feeling that I’m accomplishing things, getting control of my visual imagination and all the perceptions that go along with it.  I already mentioned the very dramatic Buffynicities that took place on Tuesday, and showed me something of the relatedness of my rendering to my intuition.

There was also a big “employee appreciation” event with a global conference call and I had a lot of interesting telepathic experiences around that that felt Jupiterian in scope.

I was also listening to a lot of Alice in Chains, especially the song “Over Now”, which was taking me back to the late 90s.  That fits with the Chiron stuff.  I also have this new method of organizing notes that I’m learning from a book, and it’s making me feel very on top of things.  That’s some Jupiter there.
 
The Moon sextiling Uranus in the afternoon brought some strange requests at work, and also an interesting sense of order as I left early for an eye exam that I scheduled last year.  It was a strange sense of success in keeping an appointment I made a year ago.  Also I haven’t been to the mall in a while, and I was looking back over a lot of the dreamlike things I’ve experienced there over the years.

I was on my way home when the Moon entered Cancer and I spent the evening very withdrawn into myself, working on Poser, enjoying the sense of control and security it gave me, especially with all my awesome new purchases.  I found out that a Platinum Plus membership on Daz actually saves me a ton of money, and membership in Renderosity is also very cost-effective.  So there’s a sense of Cancerian belonging in officially joining the online 3D community.

The Sun squared Saturn as I was finishing running.  I was feeling very excited by the power of what I was rendering and I think this square with Saturn had something to do with the clarity of my perceptions of my angel associated with this rendering.

Today I actually noticed the psi influences about ten minutes before the Moon trined Neptune in the afternoon.  I could feel them clearly.

Then as the Moon opposed Pluto I was having some interesting thoughts, having posted my first picture of my angel to Renderosity.  A lot of the intensity of the scene between Angel and Darla seemed resonant for me.  I was feeling dramatically lifted out of the mundane world into a more dreamlike place.

Tomorrow the Moon trines Chiron and Venus sextiles Jupiter.  I bet I’ll feel good and be listening to a lot of music.  I’m also going to be officially joing Renderosity Prime.  I think it will be a powerful afternoon that will enhance my sense of where I belong in this world, and where my visions belong.

10:11 PM 9/11/2017  Catching up with my narrative after several days of working on 3D instead.  Last night I tried to render on Ultra Subsurface and it just took forever.  Way not worth it until I start to publish things.  Meanwhile I’m satisfied that Subsurface Medium is better than GPU medium and much faster so I’ll be able to render more often. 

I was being a bit lackadaisical about Buffynicities, I’ve forgotten whether I had any the last couple of days, but I did have two tonight:

Buffynicity #1:  I was looking on Renderosity at this ship, “The Cockroach”

https://www.renderosity.com/mod/bcs/aj-battle-machine-cockroach/106621/

And then tonight there was this line:

Gunn:  “Well, isn’t that nice?  I thought all we had to dodge was roaches and vampires!  What is this demon up to?”

That was minor, but the major one was that I was seriously thinking about getting this room, “The Dark Council”, because I need a setting for my dystopian story about insane occultist spirit guides fucking up the lives of innocent people,

https://www.renderosity.com/mod/bcs/aj-dark-council/113847/

And then the main episode I watched tonight “Judgement”, was about “The Tribunal”.

–The pregnant woman is hurrying down an almost empty street at night, one hand on her belly. Suddenly three stone thrones occupied by dark robbed figures rise out of the ground behind her.  A horse whinnies and a knight in armor rides up the street towards them.

The three thrones and the knight match perfectly.  So that was great, and it also shows that my renders are getting more magical.

So now I get to catch up on several days of transits.

Friday, with the Moon trining Venus, inconjuncting the Sun, and squaring Pluto, was a day of strong visions about society, all the collective Plutonian forces, and how alienating they are.  With a hurricane approaching Florida, one of our major computer new systems, which is based there, was shut down and I had to wait hours to see if I was going to get paid this week, not to mention I discovered that I’d forgotten 12 library books, 3-6 days overdue each, and so I had over 10 dollars in fines! It was tedious and horrible and I could feel impending doom hovering over America as punishment for the election of Donald Trump.  Fear was in the air. 

I went home and rushed to return my books but because of the wait for the system at work I got there after the library closed.
But then the dreaming circle was good as the Moon trined Saturn and I felt extremely focused with my guides, ready to go forward and do readings for people.  Moon opposing Jupiter around midnight brought a sense of breaking free from this tedious world.

Moon was conjuncting Uranus as I woke up, and trining Mercury as I was at the library, paying my fine.  I was also provoked into actually reading one of the books which had a very nice note-taking system which I’m now using, so Mercury definitely made its influence felt. 

The Moon entered Taurus and trined Mars during the IANDS meeting and this brought some very important specifics in terms of my life as an intuitive, extremely exciting.  I also found out about an event going on next weekend.  I’m not going to write about it but the trine with Mars was definitely important.  Mercury entered Virgo late that night as I worked on Daz3D and didn’t bother to keep up with my blog.  I must say the Virgo aspect is extremely apt for working on learning new 3D software, which occupies my mind all the time now.

On Sunday I was meditating while the Moon sextiled Neptune and it was very good for me, pulling various spiritual influences together.

I worked on 3D all day and then I was in Edgewater when the Moon trine Pluto, thinking about all I’d learned at the IANDS meeting the day before, and also thinking about how rendering is changing my attitude toward comics and games, which is mostly what I shop for in Edgewater on Sundays.  The acts of imagination I’m engaging in are getting more powerful and more directly related to the underworld and to society, represented by Pluto.

I was running when the Moon trined the Sun, fitting for the climax of the first season of Angel.  Then the Moon squared Venus and went VOC which was very appropriate as I began a render on one of my highest settings then, which ran all night and which I eventually abandoned as ridiculously slow.

Today while the Moon sextile Chiron in the morning I was relishing all the new figures I’m going to buy this week – there’s a huge sale on Sci-Fi at renderosity and a lot of the stuff I’ve been looking at for a couple of weeks on it.  I was listening to “Over Now” by Alice in Chains, thinking about a climactic revenge scene in my heptalogy, and thinking about that massive project I finished this week, and how most of the pressure I’ve been feeling for several weeks is being taken care of, while some amazing opportunities are also coming up.  And the energy of rendering is brining certain psychic centers alive for me.  A lot of the pseudotrances I’ve experienced around entertainment are getting resolved.  The truly intuitive is coming through for me.

The day went quickly and I was relaxing at lunchtime when the Moon finally entered Gemini, looking forward to taking care of business on the way home so I could get back to 3D.  The Moon was approaching its square with Mercury while I was shopping.  I’m not sure what that meant.  I was pleased that I’m controlling my spending and that I got everything over with so quickly.  I’m saving tons of money. 

At home I worked on more rendering and went to run as the Moon squared Venus.  I did get a couple of good Buffynicities, as I said.  And my renders are turning out to be amazing.  I’m getting some discernment now, and I’m getting used to how nice it feels to be mastering this visual medium, realizing so many of my dreams.

I’m looking forward to the Moon squaring Neptune tomorrow.  I bet I’ll get some good stuff about the big weekend coming up, with the event at Madame Zuzu’s on Friday, a ritual on Saturday, and a circle on Sunday. Also I’m going to try to get to the Art institute on Saturday. 

In the evening the Moon inconjuncts Pluto and Venus trines Saturn.  I’m expecting some magical rendering to be taking place. 

Moon enters Leo on Friday – I’ll be at Madame Zuzu’s at the time.  I bet I’ll have a psychically affirming experience.

Mercury conjunct Mars and Moon inconjunct Neptune on Saturday while I’m at the Art Instute – I bet I’ll have an intense, energizing experience.

Moon conjuncts Venus on Sunday night and they both trine Neptune – the circle will be a big breakthrough, I can tell, especially after a weekend of big events and also more breakthroughs on Daz3D.  I’m still working on lighting and hair.  Any day now I’ll feel confident enough to start posting online, which will be a big shift for me.