I’m experimenting now with blogging about the things going on between me and the spirit world.  Some of it is outside the range of sense-experience to express, shapes moving around, energies passing through my aura, etc.  I can’t identify these things for other people.  However the advent of Kara, my angel from the sphere of Mars, has been profound and I am definitely moving toward a public approach to these subjects. 

Usually my vacations from work are times of deep transformation.  For several months now they have all gone off like firecrackers for me.  The higher worlds definitely use these times to make big revelations of the program.  This one will be the biggest ever, I’m sure – my expectations are getting fulfilled pretty regularly now.

So now begins a sorting process, and the making of decisions about which parts of my life I should discuss, and what I should say about them.  What do I say about sex, for instance?  I’m a part of a few online communities that revolve around sex and sex magic, but should that be part of my image?  How much detail should I go into about my disappointment over the failure of the United States – because I believe now that there’s nothing left of the country that I fought for in World War Two except a few slogans.

The balance moves back and forth between Kara and Sandy.  Mars and Saturn, shifting the equation around.  Doors to other worlds are opening.  For instance, when I go to the nearby comic shop on weekends I feel an opening to the astral plane, a sense of otherworldly excitement as I connect to the magical origins of all the images on the shelves around me.  Today that sensation followed me home as I went to my health club to run.  I stayed in it during my usual running trance – that’s two altered states I’m in frequently that seem to be merging.

So I’m referring to it, but I have no way to describe it specifically.

The darkness that has haunted me for years is almost dissipated. I seem to be coming in for a landing – but here’s one of those choices I mentioned.  I know why it’s happening, but what should I say about it?  I’m writing about it on the web for the existential risk of it, but I’m not actually writing “for” anyone to understand this particular issue.  We’ll have to see how that works out.  So in this paragraph I hit that boundary of shadow that will have to surround my life for a while.

Yesterday I saw the usual crowd.  I got some cool toys and some back issues – Daredevil #233, the end of the Frank Miller arc I was so engrossed with in high school.  I’m collecting action figures of villains, composing the archetypal army of darkness for my sci-fantasy novel.  I was pretty tired but I felt good about money issues and the future.  My weight was lower than it’s been since 2008, the summer after I moved to Chicago.  I’m looking forward to fitting back into clothes I haven’t yet worn in Illinois. 

And speaking of olden times my angels are wanting me to deal with the issue of all the Nazi black magic I’ve dealt with in my life … they’re definitely setting new boundaries in that area, cutting me free of the old psychic entanglements, clearing up a lot of the polluted astral energy that I encountered back in Grand Rapids.

An interesting historical footnote, since I was a teenager and first learned about Louis XIV’s oppression of the Huguenots, I’ve always wondered about them.  That name fascinates me.  Over time I came to believe that I had been a French soldier who participated in Louis’ horrible injustices against them.  Recently I was reading about them and discovered that they were Calvinists.  This would explain why I’ve always thought Calvinism was one of the most idiotic forms of Christianity imaginable, and could also be one reason I wound up living for so long in Grand Rapids, Michigan, which has a lot of people from the Christian Reformed Church, which is this pathetically lame holdover of Calvinism that barely deserves to be called a religion. 

So hating Calvinists is a karmic pattern for me, very closely related to hating Nazis.  I got a huge dose of both in Grand Rapids.

Although I’ll be putting in a few hours next Thursday, I’m basically off until January 3rd.  I’ll be continuing this series of blog entries, trying to express the changes as they happen.