“You are about an asshole, you know that?” he turned to Temilyn.

“Get in that god damn bar!” growled Zane, shoving Temilyn rudely through the door.

—

She appeared in the doorway.  Her hair was died blood crimson.  She came toward him and put her arms around him.

—

“I don’t care!” he shouted over the storm.  “I don’t god damn care!  Get out of my way!”

Zack hit him as hard as he could but it barely slowed Zane down — instead he hit back harder, full of the fury of the dead.  The rain poured down upon them as they staggered back and forth across the tilted surface of broken wood, slipping and turning in the raging fury of the storm.   They rained blows on each other as they had never done before, their furious shouting lost in the howling wind.  Zack had to wonder as he fought with all his might whether it would be worth it to kill Zane just to keep him from his idiot quest, when all he was fighting for was to keep Zane from killing himself.  At last, soaked to the bone with rain and blood — his own and Zane’s — he sank to his knees exhausted, , unable to keep up the onslaught, holding up his hands in surrender.  “You win you idiot!” he screamed, barely able to see Zane through the gray haze of the downpouring rain.  “Go ahead!  Leave Marina!  Leave everyone!  Go get yourself killed!”

But Zane was already turning away, turning toward the oncoming wave of living water that raged toward them, about to get lost in the tempestuous oblivion — until Cassie appeared, pointing a gun straight at him.

He was exhausted and barely conscious.  They half-walked, half-carried him down to the park where Marina had pitched the hospital.

—

“The message was, ‘Tell Marina to forgive herself, and rule.'”

She had to turn her face away, blinded by tears.

—

“You want to belong, you know you do.”

“You have no idea how much you piss me off when you say things like that, you normo piece of crap.”

—

He pushed the henchman’s leg back up and leaned forward, showing him the knife.  “I could cut this hamstring like cutting up a steak sandwich.  If you didn’t get to a doctor in time, you would never walk again.  Do you understand?”  He held the blade near the minion’s face and the thug nodded warily, knowing he was risking all in that moment.  “So you had better tell me what I want to know, because I have nothing to lose and you are in my way right now.  Who sent you?  Was it Kire?”

Wounded and covered in blood as he was, the thug still gave a weary laugh.  “Why go to all the trouble, asshole?  We killed your father, we’re going to kill you one way or the other -” he interrupted himself with a brutal cry as the flesh of his leg was cut two inches deep and he began to bleed.  He thrashed violently but Zack had all the leverage and held him down so he could only hurt himself more.

“Good luck walking, scumbag.  Tell me now you little son of a bitch or it’s going to hurt worse!  It’s going to go on for a long time and it’s never going to get better!  I want answers!”  He pushed the blade against the man’s chest, cutting the fabric of his black uniform.

Pinned against the wall, he could do nothing but glare at Zashic and spit the words through his teeth.  “Of course it was Kire!  Who else would it be?  It was Kire and the entire rest of the government.  You aren’t getting it.  It’s over, don’t you understand?  We own it!  There is no way to fight.  There is nowhere you can hide.  The satellites can track you wherever you go within 300 miles.  You are totally fucked!” he shouted.  “You let me go now or I’m going to make sure you go through hell a hundred times worse than this.  I swear!”

Zack had had enough so he simply slashed the throat and the soldier slumped to the ground, bleeding his life into the carpet where Zack had played hide-and-seek as a child.  But there was no time to think about that now.  He stood up and turned to go — only to look up and Adrial standing at the top of the stairs, looking down at him coldly.  She had seen the whole thing.  His heart sank, but he had to move fast.

“So now you know what I am,” he said, “and why I have nightmares.  I wish I had time to talk to you about this but we have to get you out of here now.  Your best bet is to go home and say I forced you to stay here while I fought.   You don’t have to hide anything else.  A lot of people know we’ve been broken up for a while. Just tell them the truth, that you had no idea what was going on –”

She interrupted him.”I’m not leaving you, Zack.” she said urgently.  Her eyes were glistening, ferocious.  “Let’s get in the spinner and get out of here.”

Zack took a deep, exasperated breath.  Even now, she was still busting his balls.  “My brother and Kire are conspiring against my whole family, Adrial.  They’re going to make me out like a traitor.  I can’t protect you — ”

“I said no!” she screamed.  She ran down the stairs at him and began striking him with her fists.  “We don’t have time for this.  You are not going to leave the only person in the world who is on your side.  I won’t let you.  Tell them you kidnapped me if you want, but you are not leaving me here!” she sank her fingers into the flesh of his arms and stared into his eyes.  “Now, Zack!  Let’s get in the god damn spinner and go! Don’t argue!”

He calculated the odds with speed he’d learned on the battlefield. He knew it was better to move than stay and struggle with her. Also,if they got caught she could still claim that he had kidnapped her.  “Okay, move.  Quickly. Stay low and stay away from the windows.”  They began to run down the hall but it was no use.  The enemy spinner spotted them and glowing hot rain of blaster fire poured in on them.  They made it to

I went several days without writing anything because I was having the most intense experiences of higher planes that I’ve ever had.  I don’t even want to go back five days to when it all started.  It’s enough to say that I waited for months for Mars to enter Aries so that I could observe an entire cycle from start to finish, and my expectations were exceeded for the power of the day.  However, right after the sun entered Aquarius and Mars entered Aries, there was a New Moon in Aquarius and when it shifted into Pisces my will to describe what was going on got dissipated, as one might expect. 

Moon entering Aries tomorrow, the force is coming back.  I’m looking forward to Venus entering Aries on Friday, to see if that’s equally intense. 

I channeled and received messages for so many people in the last four days.  There’s a new level of distance from it, though, a sense of separation, that I should not talk about it too much and just let the spirit work. 

It should be a fun day for me tomorrow with everything moving toward the Moon conjunct Venus around 11:30, and then void-of-course until it moves into Aries right about the time I get off work.  Then I’ll be all charged up I hope, building toward the Moon conjunct Mars in the late evening.  This is a cool pattern and I’m going to see what happens for me, as I felt totally scattered all day like I had too much work and I was a total idiot – even though I felt closer to the angelic realm than ever before.

astro-grrrls:

You make me feel like I am home again: Cancer, Taurus

You make me feel like I am whole again: Scorpio, Libra

You make me feel like I am young again: Aries, Pisces

You make me feel like I am fun again: Gemini, Leo

You make me feel like I am free again: Aquarius, Sagittarius

You make me feel like I am clean again: Virgo, Capricorn

Everything became reversed.  A green-purple glow hung in the air over the city, shimmering in the sky like the sail of a ship.  The broken remains of the Biodome flashed and bent the light in total chaos.  People sat mesmerized on the roofs of buildings, gazing up at it, afraid to look down at the chaos in the streets below.  The automated flight-paths of the skimmers were distorted and deranged.  Drones and cars on autopilot crashed into buildings, sending flaming wreckage into the crowds below.  Lights were out all over the city.  There was looting and screaming as a howling wind blew cold across the bay and swept them all into a kind of timeless fury.  People were shaking violently and falling down in the street, plunging deep into trance states they would never remember for the rest of their lives.  Others were pushed out of their bodies, their astral doubles flung into the air to look down at themselves far below.  Many of the most devout Coconstructives simply went insane.  Convinced that the Hero was about to return, they took to the streets with weapons and fury.  The war had begun.  The military sent drones to the outer city to gas the civilians, but they were overtaxed programmed for surveillance, not warfare – so easy to shoot down that it became a game to bait them, waiting to the last minute to blow them out of the sky with small arms.

It was the soldiers who presented the real problem.  And Novosh’s elite Black Guard were the worst of the lot.  Many of the rank and file abandoned their posts, not wanting to shoot their own friends and family, but Novosh’s minions, when they were not utter cowards, went to the utter extreme and plunged through the screaming crowds with abandon, spreading carnage wherever they went as Novosh sat in his lair, watching the spectacle on a bank of 128 monitors and brooding over his next step.

And through it all, all of those who remained conscious were fascinated by the eerie presence they could all feel but not explain.  A  power that seemed to come from within and without at the same time, a kind of invisible glow, or curved air that centered in their minds but which removed all sense of boundaries against the outer world.

Cassie found herself wandering, her clothes ragged and torn, through the city streets just outside the Citadel.  She was weeping, convinced that all was lost when suddenly she saw or somehow sensed with her mind’s eye a presence standing before her.

“Cassie!,” came the familiar voice.  “You should have told me, Cassie.”

Something moved ahead of her and she raised her sunken eyes to see 3Pac standing before her, just as he had appeared the last time she’d seen him alive, except that he had changed his clothes.  He was now wearing a cloak of blue velvet.

Cassie glared and lunged at him, trying to kill him, “You son of a bitch, we all thought you were dead!  I was worried to death about you.”  She struck him on the chest several times, which he allowed because he was so much bigger than her.

“I thought … I thought I could do it differently.” he said.

I just figured out that for several years the peak season of my year has been from Wizard Con in August through Haloween.  That’s Leo through Scorpio.  The reason I figured this out was that this last weekend was a Scorpio moon and I had the most magical time ever.  I was noticing that Virgo is much more magical than I thought – Brian pointed out that my chart is actually very heavily “Virgo-influenced”, with Sun and Moon in the 6th house, which is ruled by Virgo.  And I’ve always loved Scorpio, and now I can see that the cycle of the year and the lunar cycles have the same peak for me.  And also I can see that Aquarius is “boring” because it’s at the opposite end of the Zodiac from my peak season.  Aquarius-Pisces-Aries  is the opposite of the season, but I have a large Pisces influence, and I’ve always gotten along well with Aries, so basically Aquarius is the one I have to skate by.

And Sagittarius is always a flaky time for me because it comes at the end of the Scorpio peak.  It’s pleasurable, but also “exhausted”, like cosmic afterglow.  I’m still working with this however because my Angel of Mars comes from Sagittarius, right next to Scorpio in Neptune.  So I have to think about how to recombine these signs so I’m not losing myself in Sagittarius and wasting all this energy.

Scorpio was intense, but very rushed and Sagittarius I just got almost nothing done, no writing.  But here comes good old Capricorn. 

Mercury Sextile Neptune really hit me hard.  Neptune aspects are very powerful for me.  This afternoon I started surfing social media and reading all about the new administration, and I had very intense feelings about how utterly stupid the United States is now and I vowed to go forth onto the web in a crusade for the American Dream.  It’s momentum building from all the writing I’m doing, but it definitely went beyond the intellectual and into the emotional realm for me.  Comparing to the Neptune-Venus aspects last week I’m pretty sure now that Neptune aspects are always going to be major for me.

I’ll be watching tomorrow for the only aspect during the day – Moon squaring Mars around 11:33, and then going void of course until it enters Capricorn at 4:43.  So basically I’m predicting a decent morning and followed by an afternoon of who knows what? 

I’m still working on this Mars-Sagittarius/Neptune-Scorpio alchemy.  I know this is a major key.  Now that I understand the Sagittarian “vagueness” as an aftermath of the Leo-Virgo-Scorpio swing, I have to learn to pick some kind of target. 

And furthermore, Mars is moving into Aries this week, followed by Venus one week later.  This is the time to pick my intention for the whole cycle (isn’t it?).  I’m really excited about this.  I’m really hoping to get a handle on some things watching this whole year go around.

I haven’t had much time to blog about aspects because writing fiction has been taking priority – I’m still in the midst of rearranging my life around this practice.  Another issue is that I’m about to go do 12 hours of overtime, which means really good money but also that I had to cram a lot of my weekend into yesterday. 

Yesterday was an extraordinarily magical day for me, however.  I wish I had time now to decide how much I should reveal but I spent the whole day with a huge influx of magical energy related to darkness and the past.  A very high degree of synchronicity occurred related to Capricorn and the element of Earth and people I knew a long time ago.  My perception of the spirit world expanded dramatically when I was having a conversation with someone right before the Moon-Venus trine in the evening, so that’s an aspect I’m going to have to look at in the future. 

Scorpio Moon is definitely one of my favorites of the twelve.  Now we’re in Sagittarius and I feel the usual upbeat mood that is unfortunately also scattered.  For instance I don’t have time to really go into depth with this entry.

The upshot is that I love Scorpio Moon and I think a lot of this transformation in terms of writing is related to the Mercury-Neptune sextile which takes place tomorrow. 

I guess I should also think about the fact that I’m having this deep magical energy on a weekend when I’m also making a relatively large amount of money (for me). 

My browser crashed and lost my original post, so I’ll keep this short.

Moon in Virgo has been very magical.  For a long time I disliked Virgo but in the last few months that sign has had a really amazing influence in my life.  I guess I’m getting “grounded”.  So now I’m finding Virgo very exciting.  Since I’ve been recording aspects I’ve also discovered that Capricorn is actually a very good sign for me – I love the feeling of focus and getting things done when planets are moving through Capricorn.  So I am getting a lot of enjoyment out of Earth signs that I wasn’t expecting.

Not much is going on tomorrow.  There’s only one aspect during the workday, Moon squaring Mercury.  Moon also enters Libra tomorrow morning so that is what I’ll be thinking about – it’s a chance to study this aspect, maybe I’ll sense something.

I can tell in general I’m moving toward an hour-by-hour logging of my moods to see what the aspects are doing.

And I’ve been writing a lot recently about how boring air signs are, but I just found out today that someone very important in my life is a Gemini – she finally broke the Curse of the Geminis which haunted me for years.  And someone else who seems significant is a Libra.  This is an interesting revelation coming just on the cusp of Aquarius.

I’m looking forward to Aquarius, just to get a deep sense of it, and also Mars and Venus moving into Aries in a couple of weeks.  I’m going to map out some kind of magical intention to cover the whole 12-sign arc of these planets.