10:32 PM 6/29/2017  Listening to Diamond Dogs I am having the strangest memories.  I haven’t heard this album in decades.  But then when the songs start, even though they are unfamiliar, I know the last part of every line.  This is very appropriate for the Chiron retrograde.  I listened to this album constantly when I was in high school and I’ve mostly forgotten it now, but still the lines come back when I hear them.  It’s like the Statue of Liberty in Planet of the Apes – half buried. 

10:57 PM 7/1/2017  Not a whole lot went on astrologically on Friday.  The Moon squared the Sun for the second quarter in the evening while I was driving home.  I felt really great and I was very excited about my four day weekend.  I had a lot of money in the bank from my insurance issue, and The Darkening was getting more powerful in my mind all the time.  I went to see Wonder Woman at Village Crossing.  At first I was a little bored, as it began like any other superhero movie, but by the end I was very impressed with the plot and the ideas in it.  I plan to see it again.  It gave me some ideas about how to portray the queen of light in my own heptalogy. 

Even though I was awake in the morning to meditate I fell asleep again around eleven and slept through the Moon squaring Mars and Pluto.  I must admit I felt very at home in the world this morning though.  I woke up around 2:30 in the afternoon and basically just wandered in my own mind until after four, feeling slightly overwhelmed with the intensity of what I was experiencing.  But I got up in time to make it to a figure drawing session in the evening.  It made me very happy to work on my skills.  I plan to make a regular habit of this in the future.  I can capture small sections of people but now I’ve felt the shift and I’m going to start working on entire portraits, composing the entire piece.  I made it home before the Moon squared Mercury and I believe I got a good feeling from that transit, a sense of having the entire weekend still before me and a lot of good stuff to work on.  My spirits are very present to me right now.  Also I have the entire rest of the scene I started for The Darkening in my mind.

I was puttering around my bedroom, working on models and wondering what to do first, but all that passed after the Moon sextiled Saturn at 10:47 – I actually was just putting away laundry for a while and then I got back to my inner business.  Looking back I can see that I started writing this ten minutes after the sextile, more evidence of psychic timing. 

Chiron is retrograde now through December 5.  I wonder if the Darkening will be done by then?  This story is obviously about the pain I felt over losing Jody all those years ago.  I remember now that we talked about “Sweet Thing” by Bowie, and the pain was so great that I forgot.

3:22 PM 7/2/2017  So now I’m going to get this posted, like it or not.  The Chiron retrograde is slamming me, but this is a good thing because I’m bringing it down.  The pieces are falling into place.  However I have felt really lethargic since last night.  I got some things cleaned up but I also got bombed with old pain and energies passing through me that I can barely understand.

I’m pretty sure I was awake this morning when Mecury inconjuncted Saturn and the Moon inconjuncted Venus.  These transits brought with them a powerful sense of completion, of the restoration of my feeling world and a grasp on my own magical energies which I’ve been waiting for for years.  The downside is I also felt like I couldn’t get anything done.  I wanted to work on The Darkening but my mind was racing too fast.  Mars opposing Pluto brought a sense of individuation, like I finally am ready to know who I am and what I do in this lousy world, or leave it behind forever if it doesn’t live up to my expectations – which was related to the Moon opposing Uranus and then going VOC.  This series of transits was amazingly pure for me, like the magical side of my being and the resentful side were finally merging, like the game of split personalities I’ve been playing with myself is over.  I wish I could describe the “semi-real” energy state that has come down on me, the one where the lines of energy are like puckered scars in the air. 
I’m going to have to work on some way to talk about these states that’s useful for me to reread in the future.  I have to start thinking of what I’m writing as a message to myself. 

I did make it out to meditate while the Moon inconjuncted Chiron.  I felt like puzzle pieces were falling into place, like I could see better the relationship between Saint Germain and SRCM – a bureaucratic confusion which has been wasting my energies for years.  Hopefully a lot is going to get resolved.  And then over to Jewel for my usual breakfast.  I was taking a nap while the Moon entered Scorpio and now there are no aspects for the rest of the day.  I am getting in gear to do some major cleaning tonight, and then I’ll be at King Spa tomorrow.  I have a lot more to write in the evening.  I have some more lines for the Darkening.